She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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