Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
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Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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