i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
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