Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
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