He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Randomize