Who wears a wallet chain?!
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
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