soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Randomize
