You're a womanizer and a bitch.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Randomize
