Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Randomize
