When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
