...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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