I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
