And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
