i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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