I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
