just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
