Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
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