she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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