they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Randomize
