508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
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