somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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