i don't like sucking hair
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
