So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize