I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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