It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize