Moan for me like Helen Keller
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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