why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize