Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
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