Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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