you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Randomize
