hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
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