Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Randomize
