I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
25 Children of Helicopter Parents Admit The Most Horrible Thing They Were Put Through
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Proof That Kendall Jenner Is The Queen of Cannes
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.