WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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