As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Randomize
