Sponge bath it is.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
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