How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
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