The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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