when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
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I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
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I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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