It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize