ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
This house was built for laser tag.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
