omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
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