I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
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She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
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Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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