Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
