a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
