He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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