We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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