i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
