On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
