Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
